THE SCHOOL OF PAIN

For a while now, I've been dealing with a decent amount of pain in my body, and I'll tell you, it has given me a whole new perspective on folks living with chronic pain. Oof.

I've worked with clients' bodily pain since I started my practice 16 years ago, especially learning a lot while I was working in a hospice for three years. 

But experiencing it for yourself is a whole other thing, of course. I've learned a lot.

When I was a kid, I loved the What Katy Did books, about a spirited, slightly wild young girl in the 1890s, who suffers a spinal injury, and is bedridden for months on end.

At first, she is (understandably) sorry for herself, bad-tempered, and angry. She draws the curtains and becomes isolated and depressed - until a visit from her cousin Helen changes her perspective.

Cousin Helen has lost the use of her legs, but despite this, she has a sweet temperament - she is patient, kind and wise.

She tells Katy that she is now enrolled as a student in the 'School of Pain', and that her lessons will be hard - but transformational.

What I've learned in my own School of Pain is that - if you let it - pain can become your whole personality. It can become who you are, rather than what you experience.

Despite years of learning about the importance of focusing on the good, I've found myself talking about my pain regularly. 

I've complained about it most days in my diary and to anyone who asks me a simple 'how are you?'.

I've sat and thought about it while watching TV, trying to go for a walk, or doing anything physical. 

I've felt sorry for myself.

And, to be clear, that is 100% understandable and fine, and I let myself totally off the hook for doing it, because I'm human, and bless my heart.

And pain is LOUD. It is the loudmouth at the party, who sucks up all the attention in the room, making small talk impossible and ruining the vibe.

Go home, pain, you're drunk.

BUT, like any attention-seeker who eventually gives up after being ignored, pain does fade when you remove your attention from it.

I find myself 'miraculously' pain-free while playing good music loudly in the car, or staring up through the branches of a really good tree (I love a good tree), or laughing with good friends.

Pain is NOT permanent - and this is true of all pain, be it physical, mental or emotional. In fact, it's true of all things - absolutely nothing is permanent and unchanging.

As ever, it's a question of where your focus is. Whatever you focus on, you get more of that - good or bad, wanted or unwanted.

No matter what your pain is, it doesn't have to become your whole personality. It doesn't have to define you.

Pain isn't who you are, it's something you experience, in passing. 

If pain visits, you can choose to make it welcome, nurture it, feed it and encourage it to stay - or you can ask it to wait by the front door, because you know it's leaving at some point - hopefully soon.

Tell pain to pack its bags, it's outlived its welcome.

Just thinking about this image makes my pain feel less - I hope it does yours, too.

And now I'm going to rest for a bit and listen to this self-hypnosis track I made for natural pain relief - check it out, and may it ease your pain too.

HEALING WATERS - to manage chronic pain, ease stress and anxiety.

Wishing you comfort and ease.

Big love,

P.S. My waiting list for October is now full.

If you'd like to work with me in November/December, please book your free chat today.

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