Hello gorgeous you,
❤️Happy Valentine's Day!❤️
Ok, ok - before you retreat into your grumbly 'It's all commercial bollocks' response, let me reassure you. I haven't turned into a Hallmark card, it's still sweary me!
But, if you DID have that response, isn't that interesting?? Don't you want to poke at that?? Let's do it.
But first - a question before THE question: how important to your life/business/relationships do you think it is that you love yourself?
Is it all-important? Absolutely critical? Or just a nice-to-have? Or does it not matter at all?
There are lots of schools of thought on this, so I'm genuinely interested to know what you think.
I'll say this:
If you can't love yourself completely today, then you need to be willing - and actively engaged in - the process of learning to love yourself.
Just think about this for a second. If you're not even willing to learn to love yourself, then there's nowhere to go from there.
And - if you're willing, but doing nothing about it, then you get the same result: no change. Stuckness, sadness and BLEUGH.
To really honour your life, business and relationships, you need to be not only willing to learn, but actively doing something DAILY to increase your self-love.
Daily, really? YES. At least daily. Ideally several times a day.
So, are you ready? It's time to discover the positive effect of asking yourself this one powerful question:
"What's the most self-loving thing I could do for myself right now?"
I know it seems simple, but don't be fooled. Asking yourself this one question is going to change your perspective in two positive, subtle yet powerful ways:
1. You give your subconscious mind the message that loving yourself is a desirable thing.
Well, isn't that already obvious?
No, not to your subconscious mind, it isn't. It doesn't judge you, it just does its best to give you what you ask for.
So when you pass a mirror and think 'Fu*k's sake, I'm gross' - your subconscious mind says 'OK, duly noted.'
Or, if you make an innocent mistake and call yourself an idiot, your subconscious mind remembers this as important information about you - not right or wrong, just information.
And if you say that kind of thing to yourself everyday on repeat (you'd be amazed how often you do it), your subconscious mind makes that an essential part of who you are.
This one question immediately reverses that process.
So, instead of criticism, you could choose to deliberately appreciate something about your reflection.
You could choose to be compassionate and forgiving about your mistakes, remembering that literally everyone makes them.
Over time, your subconscious mind says 'Got it! I love and appreciate myself. Duly noted'
2. You set your subconscious mind a puzzle to solve - and it LOVES those.
Your subconscious mind has one job - to keep you happy. It's basically a nerdy, eager-to-please kid, who jumps on problems FAST.
All you have to do is ask it this one powerful question, and be open to hearing the answer.
Now - be careful! Remember - it's a kid. It's going to give you quick fixes and it's up to you, the adult, to decide if the answer is a good one, that will serve you well in the long term.
In other words, is this a quick fix that feels good now, but not great later? Or is it something that might feel hard now, but will probably feel good later?
OR (the sweet spot), is it something that's kind of challenging now, and will feel amazing later? Is it in line with everything you really want to be, do and have in the long term?
So you might choose to do nothing and rest - that might be the most self-loving thing for you right now. (Over-doers, take note - this is probably for you!)
Or you might choose to lovingly butt-kick yourself into doing the thing you've been putting off. (Procrastinators, I'm looking at you!)
Can you see that there is no 'right' answer here? The answer might change from day to day, circumstance to circumstance.
The question remains the same, and becomes your guide in all you do (or don't do).
So - this Valentine's Day - this moment - what is the most self-loving thing you could do for yourself?
Let me know!
P.S. This inner work can be vulnerable stuff - do you have the support you need to do it? Could getting that support be the most self-loving thing you could do for yourself today?
Book a free, no-obligation 30-min session and let's find out.